The last time I was someone’s girlfriend, I was a very different person. I’ve always been the type of girlfriend to want to be joined at the hip with whoever I was dating. It wasn’t because I was jealous or needy, just because I always felt like a boyfriend and girlfriend should want to spend all their time together.
The last time I was someone’s girlfriend, I’d had relationships that were always relatively dramatic. I’m kind of a drama queen and something in me always wanted to have dramatic relationships. Maybe it’s because I read too many books or watch too much TV but to me I always thought that a good relationship had a certain amount of drama.
The last time I was someone’s girlfriend, I let things slide in order to keep the relationship. Obviously no relationship is perfect but I allowed things to happen that should have been warning signals. I kept the relationship because I didn’t want to lose the person I was with, because I was scared of the pain of breaking up, being alone and starting over.
Boyfriend will be moving out here in a month. Sure, we’re already in a relationship now but something about him being so close makes our relationship feel more cemented. Because of this, it got me to thinking about the kind of girlfriend I am. About how I act when I’m in a relationship.
Obviously, I want to be able to spend more time with him, I want our relationship to become strong and grow and I want to figure out how to compromise and love and have a good, mature, loving relationship. However, this time around I don’t want to make the same moves that I did when I was younger.
Even though I can’t wait to spend more time together, I’ve learned to really value my time alone. I’m finding that it’s necessary to have time to yourself and I want to make sure that even though my instinct tells me I want to be around him all the time I also need to spend time with myself too.
I feel like I’ve grown up a lot and I think that I’ve realized that there doesn’t need to be drama to have a good relationship. In fact, it’s better when there isn’t drama. I’m fairly positive that I have a good handle on that one but every now and again my inner drama queen does try to make a comeback. I need to make sure to tell her to go away if she appears.
Most importantly, this time around I’m not going to let things slide. My relationship with boyfriend is good, solid, but I am never again going to be the kind of woman to let things slide because of my fear of being alone.
The last time I was someone’s girlfriend, I didn’t know what I do now. This time around I plan on doing it right.
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